Live your legacy

July 27th, 2010

In an age of unemployment and downsizing, many people are thanking their lucky stars that they have a job at all, even if it’s more busy and stressful than ever. Few people have the luxury of wondering, Is this job helping me to fulfill my purpose in life?

The unexpected death of a colleague can cause us to examine how we’re spending our lives. We ponder our mortality and envision the legacy we hope to leave for the future. Our conclusion is that the most important thing you can do is live your legacy every day. That is, don’t wait until tomorrow to live your values and focus your energies on your life’s purpose. Start with these questions:

What would people say about you at your funeral? If your life ended today, how would you be eulogized? Is it something you’d be proud to hear?

Are your actions and decisions today consistent with how you’d like to be remembered? Not only do you follow the defined rules, but how do you respond in the gray areas – when the ethical boundaries are not as well-defined? As Albert Camus said, “Integrity has no need of rules.”

Are you happy now, or waiting to be happy when…?” The Center for Creative Leadership’s article titled Your Leadership Mojo: Wisdom from Marshall Goldsmith explores the advice that your 95-year-old self might give to you today. Goldsmith’s friend actually asked elderly people who were approaching death to reflect on what is truly important in life. The number one theme that emerged was be happy now. Don’t wait for that big promotion or retirement. Don’t get so caught up in the rat race that you don’t notice the sun is shining today.

Are people your priority? The Leadership Mojo article points out that when the end of life approaches, it isn’t our co-workers who hang out at the hospital. It’s our friends and family, if we’re lucky enough to have both. And doing things today to nurture relationship with people isn’t just important to ensure that you have hospital visitors. It’s the right thing to do, and your 95-year-old-self would tell you so.

Are you accomplishing something meaningful? It can be easy to amass a collection of accomplishments or life experiences, but if they don’t fulfill some aspect of your life’s purpose, they won’t matter much to you in the end. And if you accomplished them at the expense of others, you may not have those hospital visitors after all.

One thing is certain. We’ll all come to the end of our mortal lives. We hope it doesn’t happen soon. George Carlin used to say, “I’m always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I’m listening to it.” The good news is that if you live your values today, your legacy will take care of itself.

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Posted in Change, Courage, Emotional Intelligence, Judgment, Leadership, Uncategorized, Work/Life Balance | 3 Comments »

Forgiveness at work

July 20th, 2010

Lena’s former boss was a tyrant who bullied his direct reports and rarely expressed any appreciation for their contributions. Although she left that job years ago, Lena still feels anger whenever she thinks of how he treated her. Is this something that she should address, or is Lena just responding as any normal person might?

Forgiveness is not something we talk about much in the workplace. We may practice forgiveness of others, and we certainly hope that we are forgiven when we make mistakes. Yet teams and organizations rarely discuss the power of forgiveness.

Forgiveness has often been misconstrued as condoning negative behaviors or just turning the other cheek. This couldn’t be further from the truth. You can forgive a person and at the same time set limits for future behaviors. Forgiveness doesn’t depend upon the other person apologizing or even acknowledging the behavior.  You don’t even have to speak to the person to let go of the resentment and forgive. Forgiveness is something you do for yourself. Lewis B. Smedes said, “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”

How can forgiveness at work benefit you?

Forgiveness makes you healthier. According to the Mayo Clinic, forgiveness sets the stage for healthier relationships, greater spiritual and psychological well-being, less stress and hostility, lower blood pressure, fewer symptoms of depression, anxiety and chronic pain and lower risk of alcohol and substance abuse.

Forgiveness increases available energy. Nursing a grudge takes emotional and physical energy away from more productive endeavors. According to the Forgiveness Foundation, forgiveness transforms your mind. People report renewed energy and focus when they let go of bitterness and resentment.

Forgiveness unleashes joy. Because forgiveness reduces stress, people find more joy in everyday life when they are able to forgive others. When we forgive others, all of our other relationships are stronger and deeper, and we are able to weather small upsets with greater resilience.

Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting. When you forgive, you do not forget what happened. You release the pain, anger and bitterness, and you also remember the lessons learned and don’t allow the offending behaviors to reoccur.

If the reasons above aren’t enough, consider the slightly “low road” perspective of Oscar Wilde: “Always forgive your enemies – nothing annoys them so much.” Whatever your motivation might be, take actions to create a culture of forgiveness at work. As with any culture change, start with you. Experience the joy of forgiveness and share it with others today.

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Should you be a dictator?

July 6th, 2010

Few leadership articles have stirred a response like the one titled Your Company Is not a Democracy by George Cloutier. There was even some question about whether it was serious – or if it was a parody of old-school “command and control” leadership styles. However, it’s a bona fide opinion article, and most of the comments made us cringe.

Here’s Mr. Cloutier’s advice, and Humanergy’s take.

Be a dictator. Give direction, but not about everything. Dictate the mission, values – the critical few things that will keep your organization focused and successful. Don’t waffle on those.

Tell your employees: “Don’t think – obey.” If your employees aren’t thinking, they should stay home. You need all intellects, skillsets and experiences actively engaged on your organization’s problems and opportunities.

Forget your likeability score. Earn respect through true leadership and likeability will probably come. True leaders don’t walk around with the goal of being warm and fuzzy, but they do treat people with genuine respect and kindness. They know that engaged workers who see themselves as an integral part of the organization produce better results. Therefore, good leaders communicate often, get input from their people and earn trust and respect at the same time.

Be a feared general. Don’t use fear as a tool. Using fear as a leadership tool is a sign of the leader’s own insecurities. Anyone holding the reins that tight is doing so out of fear – fear of losing control, new ideas or not being the smartest person in the room. You cannot command respect through fear. What you will create is an environment that encourages in-fighting, short-term gains and employees doing anything possible to look good.

Fear is the best motivator. Praise is a far better motivator. Our blog post on praising employees quoted research on the connection between praise and performance. Employees who receive regular praise have higher productivity and lower turnover, and they make fewer mistakes. Fear, on the other hand, may produce some short-term compliance to avoid reprisals. But because fear increases physical and emotional stress, employees are less productive over time. They’re also profoundly unfulfilled, which in turn causes your employees to dust off their resumes and find a less toxic environment.

Penalize poor or negligent performance. Spend more time feeding good performance than pointing out what’s not going well. Indeed, poor performance must be addressed as soon as it is noted. However, if you as a leader spend most of your time doling out penalties for poor performance, you are taking time from your most high value work. You should spend the vast majority of your time figuring out what is working and building on that success.

Fire incompetent employees. Surround yourself with only the best people. There should be no room in your company for people who operate contrary to the values, ethics or best practices that you’ve established. Hire and groom people who’s goals align with the organization’s and with passion to continually learn. Do that well, and you won’t need to fire many people.

Enforce, enforce, enforce. Adapt, adapt, adapt. Plans are made to be adapted to an ever-changing business environment. Rather than insisting that people follow your plans exactly, encourage adaptation within key parameters. The goals and best practices won’t change, but you’ll be nimble and responsive in how you get there.

Being a dictator requires a leader to possess all the wisdom, creativity, experience and judgment necessary for success in an ever-changing world. No one can do that. Unfortunately, some people still operate in the mindset that they can do it all, that they have all the answers. Scary. As Emile Chartier said, “There is nothing more dangerous than an idea when it is the only one you have.”

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Making requests by e-mail

June 29th, 2010

You need others to do something. The easiest way for you to communicate this request if probably via e-mail. The caution is that e-mail presents many opportunities to mis-communicate and make your job even harder. What are the best practices for using email when making a request?

Don’t start with e-mail when it’s a sensitive issue. You can certainly email the particulars later, but start with an in-person (preferable) or telephone conversation to allow for immediate two-way communication. Face-to-face is ideal because you also share nonverbals; your body language goes a long way in communicating your message, and you can also “read” others’ nonverbals to gauge their emotions and understanding.

Use e-mail’s greatest strength to your advantage. E-mail allows you to plan your message and edit it to achieve your desired results. Sadly, few people actually exercise this advantage, as evidenced by sender’s remorse- that sinking feeling you get right after you press the SEND button for that hastily-composed message. To avoid sender’s remorse, think first about what you want to achieve, put yourself in the receivers’ shoes and organize your message strategically.

Use the subject line. Give your subject line muscle with phrases like,  “Sales report: action required” or “Input needed by 7/15/10.” This informs the reader of what is required after reading.

Keep it short. Resist the urge to give lots of details. E-mail isn’t the best way to communicate vast quantities of information. Using as few words as possible, communicate your message in a way that paints a picture that everyone can understand.

Put your request up front. Don’t allow your request to get buried in the middle of the message. Keep it in the first paragraph, or people may miss it.

Use your authentic voice. Make sure your e-mail message sounds like you, not a scripted announcement. People are more open to requests when they are genuine and reflect your personality. (Well, maybe not if they don’t like the real you, but that’s another blog topic altogether.) Ideally, if you can interject a little humor, particularly at your own expense, this offsets the coldness that some perceive when communicating by email.

Note what’s going well. Making a request for action presents an opportunity to feed the team. If it’s pertinent to the issue, mention the strides made and positives actions that will set the stage for success.

Say thanks. Thank folks in advance for getting the job done, and follow up later once it’s been accomplished.

“Diamonds are forever. E-mail comes close.” Or so says June Kronholz. Countless hours are wasted trying to undo the adverse effects of a poorly written e-mail.  The reality is that some damage might be permanent. Save yourself the trouble and do it right the first time.

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Accountability with compassion

June 22nd, 2010

A recent New York Times  interview with Niki Leondakis, chief operating officer of Kimpton Hotels & Restaurants, illustrated an important point. You can hold people accountable to high expectations and show compassion at the same time. Early in her career, Ms. Leondakis felt that she needed to emulate the other (mostly male) leaders who had a take-no-prisoners, harsh style. Over time, she learned that it not only felt better to show compassion, a more compassionate approach was more effective as well.

What is compassion and how can it help you hold others accountable?

Compassion isn’t weakness. Compassion is rooted in a profound respect for others and reflects an unfailing commitment to uphold the dignity of people. As such, all people deserve compassion, even if they’ve made a mistake or even done something unethical or illegal.

Compassion requires listening. When people don’t meet our expectations, it’s all too easy to jump to conclusions. Compassion requires that you slow down and take time to gather facts and listen to the perspectives of all involved, most particularly the person who appears to have a performance issue.

Make sure performance expectations are clear. Part of being a compassionate boss is clearly outlining what you expect in terms of behavior, results and impact. This should be done not only at the point of hiring, but should be reviewed periodically. Don’t forget that communicating expectations isn’t a one-way process. Check for understanding by asking your direct report to summarize her understanding in her own words.

Schedule check-ins and follow through. The annual performance review should not be the first time your direct report hears that there is a problem. Upon hiring, or when a new project is assigned, schedule time for updates and feedback. Don’t assume that everything is going well. Ask questions and share your perspective; if more resources, such as training, information or time, are needed, advocate for what is necessary for success.

Don’t dilute feedback. You might think that you’re doing the person a favor by being less direct. In fact, you’re potentially creating harm. If your direct report doesn’t hear all of the feedback, performance may continue to deteriorate. Then you’ll be forced to deliver even more bad news – even to the point of disciplinary action.

If disciplinary action is necessary, move forward. Expectations were clear. The person was properly trained and supported. If poor performance dictates disciplinary action, as Nike says, just do it.  Not ruthlessly or in a cold manner, but don’t beat around the bush. Share the behaviors that are a problem and how they impact the organization. Outline next steps and expectations. Don’t forget to listen, too, since this is one way to honor the person’s dignity. You can certainly share that you find the situation unfortunate, but  remember that it’s not something you created; therefore, you cannot apologize for it.

Allow the person to have a reaction. Just don’t fall into the trap of taking responsibility for the other person’s feelings. You didn’t create the situation and aren’t responsible for managing the other person’s emotions. Listen and remain calm in the midst of the storm. Above all, avoid phrases like, I know just how you feel or everything will be all right.

A truly compassionate supervisor not only delivers the good news, but the bad as well. Done well, both types of communication foster positive relationships and professional growth. Having the other person’s best interests at heart is a great foundation. In addition to good intentions, deliver your clear, factual message with compassion. You will sow the seeds of goodwill and future success, and everyone will be happier. As the Dalai Lama says, If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.

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Coaching lessons from golf school

June 10th, 2010

My recent experience at golf school illustrated how frustrating and exhilarating it can be to learn something new. In fact, an anonymous but wise person said, Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle.

What lessons were learned that will help all of us to be better coaches and learners, regardless of the subject matter? For coaches:

Fundamentals, fundamentals, fundamentals. The golf pro spent 99% of the allotted time on the basic building blocks for a good swing. It wasn’t just on the driving range. Every time we had a club in our hands, she connected the dots between the current focus and the swing fundamentals.  As we built a good short shot, we also improved on our drives, and vice versa.  Whether you’re teaching someone how to sell widgets or service a machine, define the fundamentals and keep them front and center.

Stay true to what works. The golf pro was immovable when it came to the fundamentals of a good swing, no matter how many times she heard, “Well, what works for me is…” If there are tried and true best practices, stick to those and don’t compromise.

Communicate in a way that works for the learner. The golf pro used multiple means of communication, including verbal instructions, physical demonstration, video reviews and an illustrated manual. She adapted her methods to suit the needs of her students, like when her “80% angle” reference caused us all to stare blankly. She quickly understood that we didn’t get the spatial relations talk, but responded well when she said things like, “keep your head steady, rotate at the waist and straighten your left arm.” A good coach learns to communicate in many different ways – not just in the way in which he or she is most comfortable.

Break complicated stuff into manageable bits. Instead of tackling the whole swing, I spent hours working on bringing the club back to shoulder level correctly. Once my brain and body were coordinating this move well, I was able to incorporate other swing elements. Remember that people can’t keep numerous steps in their head all at once. Mastery of each component part builds muscle memory, increases confidence and sets the stage for overall success.

Use cycles of show, imitate, rectify. The pro would model the correct behavior, we would try to imitate her, and she then provided us with constructive feedback. The cycle was repeated over and over, until we were able to imitate the desired results fluidly.

Think you’re ready to be coached? A successful learning experience requires both a great coach, and a learner with the right motivation and attitude. For learners:

Align with your coach on goals. Some people came to golf school thinking that their game was great and only needed a few tweaks. The pro helped each person become more realistic about their current performance and set goals for improvement. In any coaching situation, be open to the fact that you may have more to learn than you previously thought.

Be a sponge, not a filter. In many ways, the novices at golf school got it right. They kept their mouths shut and their eyes and ears open. They didn’t waste time debating the merits of one grip or another. They took in as much information as possible, and readily tried new things. The result? Fewer tragedies and many more miracles. If you’re learning something new, try not to screen suggestions through the lens of your past experience. You don’t know what you don’t know.

Practice perfectly. Yes, it was mind-numbing to repeatedly practice the correct back swing. Contrary to popular belief, practice does not make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect. It is only through doing things right that you develop a habit of excellent performance. The amazing thing is, according to Gary Player, the more you practice, the luckier you get.

The most valuable lesson from golf school? Golf, like any skill, is not about executing the right physical movements. It is largely played in our minds. Success is dependent upon having the right attitude as well as skill set. My attitude? Focus, relish the occasional miracle of a stellar shot and remember to have fun along the way.

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Posted in Coaching, Communication, Development, Emotional Intelligence, Fun | 2 Comments »

Expectation or suggestion? Clear communication with direct reports

May 27th, 2010

Arnold is meeting with Bev, one of his direct reports. She is going over her current projects. Arnold comments that she appears to be overloaded with work that isn’t a top priority. Bev is astounded. But this is what you told me to do, she explains.

I did want you to work on projects A and D, says Arnold, but the other things on this list were just ideas I was tossing around at the staff meeting. I didn’t mean for you to act on those.

How could Arnold, as the supervisor, have aligned more effectively with Bev on what was truly important?

Define strategic priorities. You may be giving unclear direction to your direct reports because you aren’t certain about the most critical priorities. Gain clarity by discussing desired results and impact with your boss and others. Then align your direct reports’ actions with those urgent priorities.

Remember that when the boss speaks, people listen. This may seem obvious, but it’s something that is often forgotten in the excitement of the moment. The boss thinks she’s just generating some potential new ideas. Direct reports can assume that if an idea comes from her, they must make it happen.

Use clear language. Make it plain that if you are brainstorming or giving direction. You may need to say this more than once – at the beginning of the conversation and at the end – to make sure that people get the message.

Gauge people’s understanding by closing the loop. Ask people to re-state what you’ve said in their own words. If you’re not on the same page, try communicating again and have them restate their understanding once more.

Encourage people to ask questions. Some bosses are like seagulls; they “swoop and poop,”  blurting out directions and moving on to the next activity. Make time to answer any questions that your direct reports may have. Don’t just assume they’ll ask for clarification if they need it. Some people hesitate to pose questions, thinking that making an inquiry may appear less self-reliant. Set the expectation that questions are not just acceptable, but an expected part of getting on the same page.

Hold regular check-ins. Schedule time for your direct reports to meet with you to discuss progress, roadblocks or any pressing issue that impacts results. Talk with your direct reports to figure out if weekly, monthly or quarterly check-ins would be best to keep projects moving.

Clear communication is required to define the results that are to be achieved and make performance expectations clear. Achieve mutual understanding with your direct reports by regular, concise and two-way communication that keeps them focused on the right stuff and growing as individuals. Don’t assume that people interpret your communication the way you intended. Remember the wisdom of George Bernard Shaw, The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place.

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More, better, faster: Over-accelerating the pace of work

May 17th, 2010

The Harvard Business Review recently produced two articles related to the frantic pace of work that appears to be the “new normal.” The Acceleration Trap by Heike Bruch and Jochen I. Menges and The Productivity Myth by Tony Schwartz illustrate a growing problem. The ever-accelerating push for higher productivity, 24-hour accessibility, rapid-fire systems change and increasing complexity combine to produce employees who may appear to be unmotivated and listless. In reality, they’re sleep-deprived, strangers at home and less productive with every passing hour.

What can leaders do if they suspect their organization is over-accelerated? Break the cycle by facing these realities:

Acceleration is a problem with dire consequences. Over-taxed employees can’t maintain quality and safety indefinitely. A constantly frantic pace means that employees are continually shifting from one urgent priority to another, so they lack time to recharge. It may seem like your people are getting more done, when in reality they’re just putting in more hours.

You can break free. The Acceleration Trap gives many examples of companies that stopped the madness. Tough decisions and vigilance are required. It can be easy to fall back into old habits of saying yes when you should be saying no, so put measures in place to monitor decision-making, priorities and work load.

It’s not just about making your people happy. It’s about their brains operating properly. Tony Schwarz talks about how working at full throttle all the time your “prefrontal cortex shuts down in fight or flight, your perspective narrows, and your primitive instincts take over.” Think about the quality of decision-making that happens on an adrenalin high!

Your organization can still thrive. You might feel that you’re sacrificing productivity if you slow things down. Wrong. More work isn’t better. The right work is better, and everything else is just a distraction.

Working insane hours seems to be equated with commitment and drive – and the more crazy the hours, the more motivated (and promotable) you think you are. As The Productivity Myth blog post points out, it’s time for people to be measured not by how many hours they work, but by the results they deliver.

In the immortal words of Dilbert, “In Japan, employees occasionally work themselves to death. It’s called Karoshi. I don’t want that to happen to anybody in my department. The trick is to take a break as soon as you see a bright light or hear dead relatives beckon.”

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Performance is improving, but not fast enough

May 11th, 2010

You’re piloting an airplane. You take off from the airport and head west towards the mountains. Your altitude is gradually increasing, but not at a fast enough rate. Without the right maneuvers now, the plane will crash into the side of the mountain.

A nightmare, right? Yes, but it’s also a great analogy for a problem we’re seeing in many organizations. Teams and individuals are working hard and seeing improvements in their performance. However, the business realities require them to get better at their jobs faster. Without a steeper trajectory, individuals and the organization will crash.

As an individual performer, how can you maneuver quickly to amp up the rate of your performance improvement?

Prioritize. What are the highest value things you can  do to improve results and make a big impact? Not the good uses of your time – only the critical few. Make those your priorities. Keep them uppermost in your mind, on your calendar and in your daily activity. When you know where you’re going and what it will take to get there, communicate this widely so that others in the organization also redirect their efforts.

Focus. This can be hard, but something’s got to go. It takes courage to dump projects and readjust activity to align with just a few priorities. The key is to focus relentlessly on the drivers of success. Don’t do the other stuff.  If there is not a direct relationship between the project or initiative and your highest value priorities, stop!

Be consistent. One of the most maddening dynamics in organizations is when the boss says A, B and C are our only priorities. Then something cool – unrelated to A, B and C – comes along. When opportunity knocks, don’t waffle; figure out if it aligns with your top 1, 2 or 3. If not, just say no. A compelling distraction is still a distraction.

Many of the strategies above work for teams too. Also consider the following:

Assign sufficient resources. As James W. Frick said, “Don’t tell me where your priorities are. Show me where you  spend your money and I’ll tell you what they are.” Clearly articulate a business case for what you’re doing. Then negotiate with your superiors to assign more time or employ new technologies to get the job done.

Feed your people. You’re leading a team that’s failing. Your first impulse might be to point out all the things that are going wrong. Instead, identify what’s working (Feed) and reinforce those behaviors. Then decide what you must achieve (Need) and fill in the gaps with new actions (SEED) that need to happen. Only after Feed, Need and Seed do you eliminate practices that aren’t working (Weed).

Quit bickering. When the going gets rough, back-biting and blame find fertile ground. Model and enforce a climate of open communication and respect. Help people to say what they need to say in a factual manner. After the crisis has passed, there will be plenty of time to dissect what happened and how it might be prevented in the future.

A Chinese proverb states, “A crisis is an opportunity riding the dangerous wind.” Face the reality of your impending collision, so that you can maneuver to make the most of the opportunity.

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Posted in Change, Courage, Customers, Judgment, Leadership, Strategic, crisis | 1 Comment »

Leadership lessons from Mom

May 3rd, 2010

That MBA degree is dandy, but the lessons learned can’t hold a candle to Mom’s (or Dad’s or Gram’s) wisdom. A recent poll of Humanergists resulted in these leadership lessons from our very first role models.

I don’t care if “everyone” is doing it. Mom taught us to have courage and make decisions for ourselves. Don’t get caught up in passing trends or we’ve-always-done-that thinking.

If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything. Sometimes harsh truths must be spoken, but keep balance by sharing positives as well. Don’t speak in anger, when it may be harder for you to communicate the good along with the bad.

Accept a compliment graciously. Maybe it’s embarrassment or false humility, but we often stumble or say, “oh, it wasn’t that great,” when a simple “thank you” is all that is needed.

Get outside. While this phrase was most often used when Mom was sick of us underfoot, we recognize now the power of nature to boost our mood and change our perspective. Get up, walk around, go outside or do whatever it takes to change your environment. You’ll find inspiration -  or at least some respite from the usual routine.

What am I, chopped liver? Especially in adolescence, we kids acted as if our parent were alien life forms and unworthy of kindness or consideration. Remember that even the most quirky of our fellow humans deserves respect and compassion.

Do you want your face to freeze like that? Nonverbals not only matter, they communicate volumes, even when we’re not aware of them. Get some feedback about how your posture, facial expressions and mannerisms help or hurt your leadership.

Every cloud has a silver lining. No matter how distressing, every situation has potential advantages and disadvantages. Don’t ignore the cloud, but do recognize and capitalize upon the silver lining.

If wishes were horses, then beggars would ride. Dream big, but don’t just passively yearn for things to be different. If you want something, take a step today to make it a reality. Action is necessary to achieve.

Be home in time for dinner. There’s nothing like unstructured time with loved ones to recharge your batteries. Share a story, a joke or something that happened in your day. Listen as others to do the same. Even if it’s just take-out pizza, it will be a feast.

Mom’s most enduring lessons were not the ones she talked about.  They came by the way she lived her life – with grace in spite of our many imperfections and bravery in the face of life’s challenges. The least we can do is try to do the same. Thanks, Mom.

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